The Great #Minecraft Garden Caper

For some reason, I love growing stuff in Minecraft. Probably because there’s no actual work or dirt involved.

So one of the first things I do is go around whaling the tar out of tufts of grass. Every ten tufts or so leaves a handful of seed floating in the air. When I collect ten of those handfuls, I go plant them. Sometimes the seeds fall down when I whack the bejeebus out of tree leaves. Either way, what they grow is wheat. Yeah, what can I say, it’s Minecraft.

Sometimes you can find pumpkins growing in the wild, which is fun. Put one pumpkin onto a crafting table to get pumpkin seeds and plant them. Just make sure there’s a strip of ground next to the strip where you’ve planted your pumpkin seeds, of the suckers will never pop out a pumpkin.

When I was in a jungle biome, I found melons in the wild and grew them, though you couldn’t do anything with them, like you can with pumpkins (Jack-o-lanterns! Wheee!)

But I want to grow MORE!

So far, I haven’t been able to find any beetroot, which doesn’t tear me up too much, since I hate, loathe, and despise beets, but I would grow it if I found it. Because gardens.

SO.

I walked and I wandered and I swam until I found a village. Here’s a village with some villagers (who are identical except for their clothes). If you look closely at the background, you can see one of their gardens.

villagersNo, I didn’t kill them with my pickax. But I did go into their garden and harvest some of their potatoes and carrots. I replanted for them — I’m not a total barbarian — but I took some of their harvest and ran home with it.

And I planted it.

gardenThat was my house at the time, made of birch wood, glass, and GOLD ORE. I’ve since rebuilt it, which I’ll show you another time when I finish remodeling.

Such a scofflaw I am!

I’m posting today at Fatal Foodies about a chopped salad that didn’t kill us.

A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: Write about your character breaking the law.

MA

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When A Story Is Bejected … er, REJECTED #amwriting

Before I forget: This is the first of the month, so there’s a new story on the Hot Flashes page.

Now. The first thing you do when you have a story bejected is The Bejection Dance. Get that out of the way first off.

Here’s a link to The Bejection Dance, which I originally posted on my old WEBLAHG. It was just like this blog except … well … except nothing. When I started this blog, it was supposed to be all professional and nothing but business, but that kind of fell by the wayside, and now it’s almost as random as the old site. ALL RIGHT, IT’S JUST AS RANDOM — ARE YOU HAPPY? HUH?

I wrote a story for a themed anthology, and it wasn’t accepted. It was, in other words, bejected. Bejected is just like rejected, but you’re also dejected. And everybody knows that r + d = b. So.

The anthology is of stories that all begin with the line, “No shit, there I was.” As you can imagine, a speculative fiction story beginning with that line could go pretty much anywhere. But the editor apparently didn’t want to go where I went, so the story was declined.

I once went to a panel of anthology editors, one of whom shared the insight of a magazine editor who said she could always tell when a themed anthology was about to come out by the number of submissions she got with the same element in common.

So the second thing to do is rewrite the story so that editor wouldn’t know it was a reject from a themed anthology. In this case, that’s easy.

Here’s the current first line:

rewrite“No shit, there I was.” Mrs. DiMarco flicked the hand holding her cigarette, spilling ashes on her fish sandwich and fries. “Dammit!”

So I’ll change it to:

“I’ll tell you what happened.” Mrs. DiMarco flicked the hand holding her cigarette, spilling ashes on her fish sandwich and fries. “Dammit!”

And I’ll send it somewhere else. And, eventually, I’ll sell it. And then I’ll do The Asseptince Dance.

A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: Rewrite the first sentence of a short story without changing the meaning of the paragraph.

MA

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DEAD GUY Is Live! #audiobook

It’s here! It’s here! Bryant Sullivan’s production of A DEAD GUY AT THE SUMMERHOUSE is up at Audible! In case you can’t tell, I’m so excited I could plotz! ~MA plotzes~ See?

audiobookMitch Franklin thinks he’s got it made when the town’s wealthiest eccentric hires him to look after her two lapdogs. Then he meets her family. Five years ago, the last guy she hired played head games the family and servants are still trying to recover from. He also wound up dead. Now, some people think Mitch might be just like him. Some people think Mitch might be him, back from the grave. Will Mitch survive the anniversary of his predecessor’s death, or will he be another dead guy at the summerhouse?

Here’s a 5-minute sample. If it doesn’t work, just go to this page and listen to the sample there. Let me know what you think in the comments here!

~Doing the plotzing dance~

Kindle Price: $2.99

Print Price: $13.73

Audiobook Price: $19.95

Click here to read the first chapter.

Buy from Amazon in print.
Buy for Kindle.
Buy the Audiobook.

A WRITING PROMPT FOR YOU: Something happens that sends your character into a happy dance.

MA

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